To our brothers and sisters who remained on the field : “Will you ever forgive us ?” by Mrs. Randa Shabana

When we were together, no one could  overcome us. At the begining, they tried to scare us with their brutality. They used their water hoses and their live and rubber bullets. A lot fell down. Many died, but it only made us stronger. They ran over us with their cars but we persisted and stood fast. They withdrew from the field and gave their own weapons to criminals. They opened the doors of their prisons and sent the murderers and outlaws with machine guns into our streets to kill and rob us and terrorize our families. We stood together and protected ourselves with bare hands. We still prevailed. We were still together then. We were heroes then. We became stronger and more enthusiastic. We set an example of courage and devotion and moved the whole world. We won the army to our side and we were so close to victory.

They then gave us “time”. And then more “time”. We waited and waited. When is ” God’s victory”? , our hearts asked. They knew us well enough. They knew just how long we can wait. Finally they came up to us with promises. They knew we had no other choice but to accept it. We fooled ourselves into believing that we achieved what we came for. After all they did to us, we decided to trust them and give them a second chance. We had enough, and enough was enough. We were exhausted and frustrated. It was time to go home. It was time for a hot shower and a good meal. We wanted to sleep in our beds and wake up to resume our normal lives like we used to. We want to enjoy all the things that mad us happy before. We want our cellphones and our internet back again. We just can’t live like that anymore. But we didnt want to feel guilty about leaving our brothers and sisters who persisted and remained fighting for the cause. We called them mad people, agents of foreign countries with some special interest, ignorants who are being manipulated by political parties seeking their own benefit.  We called them “provokers of fitna among  ourselves”. We said those protestors are the reason for all the damage and they don’t represent us anymore.  We stabbed them in the back so we can feel better about ourselves. Some of us even started defending the criminal dictator and joining his ranks.

Then came the paid, worthless, ignorant creatures protesting in favor of the regime. The ones who don’t even count as human beings. The ones who are paid to kill our brothers and sisters without mercy.They are the product of this regime and they don’t know any better. But we were different than those. We knew better, but we were too weak to accept the magnitude of such a sacrifice.  Only then were we defeated. They prevailed over you and started the blood shed. They made it look as if it was us that were killing you. Indeed, it was us who killed you but not with our own hands. We gave up on you. As always, defeat comes from the weak hearts  among ourselves, and we were those weak hearts among you. Will you ever forgive us ?